Many days had passed before I was able to work again on music, I think many people thing that Alpha are able to support themselves through the music but the reality is that we all have other jobs. Only in my spare time can I create music. This is no easy task because creating music can take a lot of time especially if you are a musician like myself. Even though I have been producing music all my life I still do not know much about notes , chords and stuff like that but I know about sound and how to mould it. It can take a long time to finish a song by moulding, sometimes from days to weeks to years but it can produce something a little different. Making time to work has on occasion only happened after selling a home, taking out a loan or some other equally poor business plan but it has provided a time period to focus on music. If you have a family I don’t recommend this approach unless you use the same excuse I do, which is that I never made these poor decisions because we have very little influence in the outcomes of life. I believe there is no free will on an individual basis only as a mass movement such as a wave in history. Of course it is humanly impossible to think that we are not making the decisions otherwise most people would give up caring. Free will is a topic of great debate and I have made my conclusions based on many years of reading related science articles. For example the brain passes most functions to your conscious side after the event has occurred. Even though it takes under a second to go from one part of the brain to our awareness part we are only aware of things after they have happened such as moving your arm, reading these words, making a decision and picking your nose. In my case my wife often hits me , I ask what that was for, she informs me that the children will pick up that bad habit and it is then I realise I am picking my nose. Chaos theory shows that events however little in our environment around us and beyond will effect what happens to us. Is it that we are actually making predictions as to what might happen based on events around us? Knowing that change will happen because it does happen we can predict what important changes are coming up and then look at the most likely possibilities of that forthcoming event and create a decision scenario. We are eluded into an illusion that future possibilities are decision. Sometimes our predictions become reality and so we feel that we made the right choice or as it may be the wrong choice. Did you get that?
Before starting to write another tune, it was delayed by the unavoidable event that a walk would be a good source of inspiration and this time the video would be somewhere open, very open, not in a depressive wood. I set of quickly to a location not far away because there was little time left before sunset. The air was crisp and my mind clear, the walk was not new to me but today it felt different somehow. As I climbed higher I thought only of the mountain and how long it must have taken to create such beauty. The vastness brought a great sense of calm, something I needed to bring back to the studio. The more I walked the more I felt the great expanse of time that has passed to create these mountains, the endless cycle of water on its journey to the oceans and back. Without the oceans the earth could not erode these mountains, the beautiful world would fade away.
Why do the mountains and valley look so beautiful? Nothing has changed for thousands of years and it looks so perfect. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder they say, is it only us that sees this as beautiful? How does Affleck see it? He probably does not care either way so long as there’s something to pee on. In his mind is he unaware of the concept of incredible views? Is it something that only intelligent animals have? For humans, we know what is attractive not just in each other but in our surroundings. This valley is old, untouched by human hands, it has known destruction because a glacier cut it’s way through to create this valley so somehow destruction and creation is seen as beauty. I think beauty is a lot of things, something very ancient and hard to understand. People perform a similar creation or reproduction around their houses and call it a garden. Creating flowers beds, streams, ponds and rockeries. Gardens are a reflection of nature but they have to be maintained to keep them looking attractive, something they cannot do on their own. But here in the mountain it does without any help or interference from us through an long established ecosystem, something we cannot do, plant an ecosystem. Is this beauty?
As I walked further being constantly thrilled by these surroundings I thought of gardens I had attempted to make and given up on, the disappointment in them that they did not deliver and concluded that I am not a good gardener. It then came to me that this was ‘My Garden‘, very little work to do, not something I decided, something that always was. A vague new understanding of a consciousness had trickled through my mind of something great but I could not formulate anything more than that, I had no way of accumulating it into words or grasping the concept but maybe sound could?
It was wonderful, I felt complete calm within myself and so I took this back to the studio with a determination to reproduce these felling in sound. To my surprise a song began to emerge with a calm vibe, it was in the air and coming out the speakers too. Sitting back it seemed finished, I could listen to this for hours just as it was but I didn’t have the time it was late, so I took a mix and named it appropriately ‘My Garden’. I have learned that it is important to take a mix as soon as you feel it has a good vibe before it is destroyed, for here lies the danger. Your enjoying the tune you have just created, you get excited and start fiddling with it and before you know it you’ve lost what was making it good it in the first place. Not sure it captured the new understanding or feeling I had in the mountains earlier. Now I was even having trouble remembering what it was even vaguely about? The next day I did continue to work on ‘my garden’ and took it in two other directions, one which I have never attempted before myself singing and the other quoting from James Lovelock*, the last spaceman.
*James Lovelock author of ‘Gaia’ and many more
Part 4 – ‘Poisoned’ coming as soon as we reach 100